There was one training at macritchie on a Saturday morning. I checked my watch at the half way mark and realized that if I kept at my pace, I'd hit a pb. I was feeling strong and cld even push my pace. So my pb was broken by a fair bit.

Fast forward into a few wks or mths, I had just came back from a hiatus. I was good enough to try a decent time but not good enough to challenge my pb. At some point of time during the run, I decided to run with someone of lower level than me. And I pushed her. I talked to her throughout the entire way. I encouraged her, I checked time. I made her chase me when she slowed down. In the end, she crossed the finish line not with a pb like a glorious movie ending but somewhere near it, of which she hasn't touched for quite some time now. The gratitude and happiness displayed, the feeling of being important and needed ..all these combined and made the latter scenario a much more satisfying run..

Celebrated jolenes 21st bday try with her family , boyfriend and Vicki. It was such an amazing time of dinner.
I don't know what it is, maybe it's from the drama that I've been immersed in for the past 2-3 days, but I felt extreme sadness when I came home.. I felt alone, I felt fear, I felt disapppontment from a failed attempt.

The drama I've been watching is Dream High. It has pulled along great tidals of emotions, the simplest emotions of happiness and sadness, of uncertainty, hatred, BOREDOM heh, hope, curiosity and dream. The title is so cliche but the show resurfaced many of my dreams and magnified them. Maybe it s the show or maybe I'm just growing up...

Dad came back today. This genius brought everything out of the cab except a pouch with his iPad and some cash inside. I was so frustrated and upset that I punched a box. I don't know why I acted as such... Was his white hair becoming more obvious, his eyes getting more sunken, eye bags protruding more, cheeks getting more sagged..the effects of aging becoming more evident? Coupled with the weakness in his expression and actions because he's suffering from food poisoning....

When I heard his gagging sounds, one phrase flashed to mind: it is difficult to hate someone when he is at his weakest.

Very soon I'm going to become a mother.. And I promise right here and now that I'd fight all the way for my kids.
I don't know if it is going to be beneficial or whether they even want it,. What I do know is that this is something that I greatly desire. And so I won't stop until they tell me straight to my face to stop my nonsense.

I guess Time is of value too, just like how we put a value to cash. I've always wondered why people wanted to live longer...what can or what will you do with more time? I've no answer to that..and this is where my weakness starts to show.