today was a day for many firsts

i went to facebook website on my own for the first

for the first in a long while in greenandwhite i see a bright house i walk towards

a first i'm blogging two times in two days

i'm going to neighbours hse to do work tdy, that's a first too

went to some macs for breakfast alone, fell asleep there, a first too

i read my first book for the year. the notebook, nicholas sparks. go read it. then go read the wedding. oh my really gd books. its abt aged love, not those teenage like here like there flings kind. hes 80yrs and still loves his wife like crazy. that kind of love.

2 types of people
1) influenced and convinced by the world, true love will nvr happen.
2) still believes theres hope for true love to exist and nurture even in this society.

life is not meaningless, just haven't understood it yet.
i like that phrase

oh btw i went home early tdy. and thats a first. for mondays. kinda sad though like yay i'm going home early. zzz and i'm changing.i'm becoming a horrible person. but i'm starting to adopt a 'if someone asks me to do sth, and i really have no mood to do so, i'll just reject him' .i think it's good cos why force yourself? and being the other party, i wldnt feel gd too. like say i want to call and talk abt sth sad that just happened, and that person out of pity listens, i'd rather not call that person. out of sympathy is much better appreciated. like how i stopped giving thanks during a period of time to God for food cos i felt i was doing it out of duty not cos i want to. if it's out of responsibility, i'll grit my teeth and do it. but not if i have a choice,besides you did give me a choice right.. but i feel really bad. really really bad. i'm starting to lose my sincerity, my kind sympathetic self.... oh Lord why is this so... give me time , i will change. i will try my best to change.