my heart rate is ABOUT 76 now =/ eeep x(

i spent my whole aftn reading *'s blog all the way dating back to when * was my age... she's someone i respect a lot.

it dawned upon me that next time when i'm 25,26 years old, rawkwivme will most probably still be around and available for my ,and others', pleasure reading. nothing much about me and my personality will change except for my surroundings and circumstances. so if i want to get out of this shit i am in, i must make a conscious effort to do so...

it's said that people go through this certain stage of growth and self-identity moulding in "adolescence" or "teenage" years... i feel like , during those years that that stage was supposed to happen, i was thrown into so many activities and leadership stuff that i didnt have room nor time for my own personal development .:. it's delayed and is taking place now......... but i'm left alone now to deal with this. and i dont know how

ANYWAY . AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH. three more months of being a teenager. sian sian sian sian sian sian. where did all the time go to?? x(

3RD DAY OF SCHOOL YTD. SIAN. i hate it already. it's so tiring and lonely and boring it's already getting to me :'(

youthday ytd! watched the notebook again. :) wheep